Katelyn is so awesome and pulls out her phone and types in funny things people say sometimes. She has a page in her notes app dedicated to our family, and I'm so grateful! She's caught some great things!
So she forwarded me the 2023 Quotes. So entertaining!!
Emma: grandpa Jamie hasn’t changed his face in a while.
Owen: salad- meat with obstacles
Emma: *calls a baseball bat a baseball stick*
Emma: I don’t want to go in the store!
Dad: I’ll stay in the car with you if you don’t want to go.
Emma: fiiiiiiine.
Dad:…do you want to go in the store or stay in the car?
Emma: YES!!!!
Dad: ????
Whitney: imagine Owen shoots a rock at the temple. It chips. That’s like a federal offense of Jesus!
Me: what is the capital of Nebraska?
Emma: N.
Emma: *calls cream cheese “bagel sauce”
Emma: have you seen Whitney’s dreams? Her EYE is her dreams!
Whitney: I’m in love with so many boys I can’t even… I’m so depressed! I’m gonna cry!
Emma: when we moved here there were only a couple of houses, but then like a year later? It kaboomed!
Emma: mmm butter is my dream!
Maris: Heatstroke! Isn’t! Real!
(She says crying in her bed because mom won’t let her sleep with three blankets while wearing long sleeved Christmas pajamas, slippers, and a Hogwarts robe in the middle of summer.)
(Dad stops really abruptly while driving)
Whitney: oh. My. Gosh. I was like, seeing Jesus bruh.
Whitney: I’m just not that much into working.
Dad: I guess you’re not that much into money either!
Owen: *sighs* Farting makes me happy.
Mom: I’m not anti-internet I’m just annoyed by the internet.
Whitney: okay dude.
Naomi: I’m not a dude I’m a Miss!
Owen: I know there’s this one girl who has a crush on me because she was eyeing me all day.
Whitney: mom planes don’t actually crash that’s just in the movies!
Whitney: I keep thinking it’s Sunday but then I think no it’s not cause it’s Saturday but it’s not Saturday either it’s TUESDAY! I’m having a midweek crisis. And it’s not even the middle of the week!
Owen: why are there ribs on my back?
Whitney: Owen! Sixth grade is for dating around! *laughs* why am I so funny!?
Mom: is that turmeric (too-MARE-ick)
Whitney: to-MARE-ick!? Yeah, cause we live in Americ.
Owen: if you’re going to go to prison, go to prison in france
Owen: my neck muscles are strong and my skull is unbreakable because I drink so much milk!
Emma: the world can end WHENEVER. Like at night when you’re asleep, and you won’t even KNOW. Except you’d be awake.
Emma: everybody cut everybody cut MOVIE!!!
So Grandpa made mom and dads bed really nice. Owen: that’s the nicest I’ve ever seen the bed!
Justin: (points to clouds) it’s getting gloomy outside!!
Whitney: I just think it’s weird that like, adults do theater.
Mom: missionaries don’t come in ones.
Owen: (after snarfing two tacos at Cafe Rio) I’m like a human paper shredder.
Whitney: except… not paper…
Emma: MOM how could you not listen to me!? Is it cause you’re old?
Maris: (looks at quote book) there’s none of mine!
Emma: no offense Maris, but you’re not funny.
Whitney: (on Rubix cubes) I really thought this was going to be a two day thing, but it’s like, not.
Dad: it’s a lifestyle!
Whitney: (who mixes up the Rubix cubes so the rest of us can solve them) I am perfectly content with my role in this family.
Owen: (while lighting candles) ahh. Don’t you just love open flames?
Whitney: Owen is the Chinese knockoff of google.
Emma: I know why Home Alone is called Home Alone. It’s cause he’s home, and he’s alone.
Emma: I was in mom’s tummy and then I came out, and I was like, train coming through! Train coming through! Waaaa!
(She says while reenacting her birth)
Emma: mom, you’re going to have to get used to people calling you grandma.
Emma: one, two, skip a few, ninety nine, one hundred! I used to say that, but it’s not skipping a few. It’s skipping like all the tens in the world.
Emma: (drinks sparkling cider) mom this sparkles my mouth
Me: (singing) I’m dreaming of a slightly white Christmas
Owen: (also singing) More like a melodramatic gray
Owen: (starts solving a Rubix cube) Oh this is easy. Eeeasy brotha. Easy on the horse meat there. Stop eating our pack mules!
Emma: I was a baby I didn’t have no brain.
Owen: the number of eyes an animal has depends on how many legs it has. Humans have two legs and two eyes. Spiders have eight legs and eight eyes.
Me: and horses have four legs and four eyes?
Owen: yup! If the horse has glasses!
Emma: (to Whitney) I remember when you used to say “slay” but now you say “bruh”.
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